You were so happy together, but then something happened and now you’re apart. If you really want to get back together with your ex, then you’re going to have to some soul searching. It isn’t easy to be completely honest with yourself, but that’s what you have to do.
You need to decide if getting back together will really make you happy, and you also have to decide if you’ll be able to do things right if you do. After all, you don’t want to break up again. It’s natural for us to only recall the good times after breaking up, but you have to look at the bad times to, you need to be objective and realistic.
Apart from the myth that Hollywood likes to put up on the silver screen, most relationships that split apart are not worth saving. That may be hard to hear, but we’re dealing with reality. If your ex and you spent most of your time arguing and being unhappy, as opposed to being happy together, then you will probably be better off finding somebody that’s a better match for you.
Apart from arguing, abusive relationships are usually better left in the past. If you or your ex were physically, mentally or verbally abusive then it’s probably time to move on (there are always exceptions, of course). But if your relationship was pretty good overall and worth fixing, then the following will help was a good one, and they weren’t abusive, and they were of sound mind, the following should help you get back together with your ex.
Nobody likes a pest, so don’t be pushy; you may just push them away for good. If you’re always trying to communicate with your ex; whether by email, telephone or tracking down there whereabouts so you can talk in person, you are overdoing it. Not only will it look desperate, but it will be irritating, and you want to create positive connections, not negative ones.
Don’t beg or make empty promises. It’s easy to think about how doing so will win your ex back. You picture yourself making the perfect plea, pouring your heart out, but…you will never be able to accurately predict how your ex will react, good or bad. You can’t change the past. You can apologize, ask for forgiveness and be sincere, but this alone won’t get you back together. You also need to prove that you are serious. Having a plan for how things will be different will go much farther than sobbing about the past.
Live in the present. Nobody is saying you should forget about the past. In fact, it would be smart to learn from it. But, you don’t want to go so far as to live in the past; that’s a fantasy world. Instead, focus on current realities and work on rebuilding your relationship from there.
If you are serious and ready to get back together with your ex, then give them some space, don’t beg or make empty promises, and stay rooted in the present. These things will surely improve your standing as far as your ex is concerned, and you will keep your self-respect as you move towards a happier life together.
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